It's hard because your ego and programming has the drivers seat and your healing on a deep level and waking up all at the same time . Plus battle between heart and mind and all kinds of stuff .You will eventually get to a point where maybe the ego is not dead (NOT complete death you don't wanna do that). But you are aware enough to say no to your ego and start doing the right things .and don't believe those who say kill your ego completely because you would be floating in outer space. You need it to navigate through this world . You wanna put it away from the drivers seat but not completely kill it. When I say ego i mean programming. Meditate and stay healthy and stop watching main str eam stuff. Anything on tv radio anything popular is usually garbage .